Why "Just This Once" Is the Most Dangerous Thing You Can Tell Yourself

We've all said it.

Just this once. Just one more scroll. Just one more drink.

Just one more binge.

Just one more time saying yes when every part of you wanted to say no.

It feels harmless in the moment.

Reasonable, even.

But just this once is rarely just once — and it rarely arrives out of nowhere.

Before almost every maladaptive behaviour — whether that's overeating, drinking, compulsive scrolling, avoidance, or anything else we use to cope — there is a negotiation. A quiet internal conversation where the mind makes a case for the behaviour, airbrushes the consequences, and presents the whole thing as perfectly justified.

It's brilliant, really. If it weren't so destructive.

The negotiation shows up differently for everyone, but the mechanics are the same. It speaks in your voice.

It knows your weak spots.

It waits for the moments when you're tired, stressed, lonely, or overwhelmed — and then it makes its move.

The good news?

The moment you learn to spot the negotiation — to name it, to step back from it — its power begins to shrink. You cannot fight a thought by wrestling with it.

But you can learn to watch it.

And watching it clearly is where change begins.

As a mental health coach working with CBT, this is something I explore with clients across a wide range of behaviours. I

t is also something I am developing into a book — one that looks at the negotiation, why it works, and how to interrupt it before it closes the deal.

If any of this sounds familiar, you're in the right place. Feel free to get in touch.

Because just this once deserves a much better answer than the one your mind has been giving you.